Sinister Indecision

Sinister indecision

It haunts me like a ghost

Impaired with inhibition

It grips my neck

And makes me choke

My self-imposed prohibition

Like the drink to a drunk

My sinister indecision

Leaves me drowning

Under the thick of night

The black hole of insomnia taunts me

Dreading the next day

If I don’t sleep

It stays away

Stuck in this cycle of consumption

I need more, yet want nothing

Company alludes me

Alone is soothing

Dreams and nightmares

Days and nights

Sinister indecision

Leaves me fraught with fright

My potential screams in my ears

Deafening with its demands

While my legs are paralysed with fear

With my ice frozen hands

Wanting to move forward

But fatigued by expectation

Sinister indecision

You must be perfect

You must not fail

Sunlight on my skin

Like a vampire in the day

Waking me from my zombie state

My existence of decay

Sinister indecision

Will not live another day